Post Op

No turning back now! We have begun the steay, slow climb up the mountain for the next few years! Wow, I am so not ready for this, but at this point there is no choice.

Despite being hungry, uncomfortable and sucking the rubber off his binky Payson was a pleasant child this morning. I informed the nurse that I wanted to take Payson for a walk around the unit with no monitors or oxygen. She didn't think that the doctor's would agree. It was then I informed her that I will either do it with their permission or without, but I would not be denied this. Before long a nurse said the doctor would prefer if he was left on the oxygen and I decided I would comprise that. Before I knew it I was walking around with oxygen, monitors and a nurse. So, much for a little bit of family time with our son free and clear of any lines for the last time. ARRRR

As the surgical time drew near and people began to decent upon his room his heart rate rose and he stared people down. He knew something was about to happen, but was unsure what. With a steady hand I inked my signature and they whisked him away never to be the same. As I watched him disappear down the hallway I just wanted to yell, "STOP", but I refrained and just fell apart in my husbands arms. With a quick wipe of the face Todd and I went to do a few things before heading back to Payson's room to wait for him. Roughly 1.5 hours later, Payson arrived back in his room awake and agitated. He was crying, but had no sound. He would cough causing his whole body to shake, but he was mute. I was scared to look at this new boy, but did and was able to see my precious son without anything attached to his face. Now all he had that dreaded tube coming from his neck. It was scary, intimidating and hard to see, but despite that he was still my cherub faced miracle. With Payson awake, moving around and beginning to take out his IV's they decided he'd have to be sedated for the next couple of days. I have been told that they will most likely bring him out of sedation on Friday, just in time for Christmas. They were able to start his feeds tonight and work them back up to full feeds over the next couple of days.

The plan for now is to keep him ventilated and sedated until Friday. On Friday they will do the first trach change and that is when we can begin our training. From there it is as fast as we can go, but the minimum time frame we are looking at is six weeks. That is bare minimum. Depending on what doctor you speak to is whether or not he will be on a vent full time, sporadically or as needed. Time and Payson will have to unveil that plan. As of this evening the machine was taking 25 breaths for him, but Payson was overriding it and taking an additional 1o breaths. Woohoo, son you keep on pushing the limits! Just like your momma! I firmly believe that Payson doesn't need full time venting and should be on a as needed basis. I will make this very clear to them over the next few days as Payson continues to push his way through this. Ultimately, Payson is the one who will show us the plan not the doctors. During surgery our surgeon (the one who mad the esophageal repair) stepped in to do a x-ray on him. The x-ray revealed that there is some stricture at the point of repair, but that it looks great. He was pleased that when he had acid reflux that it went up past repair and back down. Sometimes it will go up but can't go back down. Good news because this means for the moment he won't have to be dilated. The surgeon is still considering a stomach wrap surgery, but this too will be revealed in time.

Okay, I am exhausted emotionally, physically and mentally so I am off to bed...I will try to post more about all of this tomorrow!