The Sweetest Thing

Happy One Month Birthday Payson John! I can't believe a month has flown by and we all have managed to survive the medical emergencies, transfers, infections and lack of privacy the NICU offers! At times it feels as if we have been doing the going to and from ritual for longer than a month...It almost feels like a normal aspect of our lives. Sad, very sad! (: At least we are a month closer than we were this time last month to having the surgery and getting out of the hospital!

Today was one of the best days that I have ever had with Payson. He was asleep when I arrived, but soon woke up to just hang out. I held him in a sitting up position and it was like he was seeing the world for the first time. He just sat there for hours looking around at the lights, me, the wall, chairs, anything and everything that had a shape to it. He studied things so intensely, would move his arms around as if he was trying to reach things and amazed me at how well he controlled his head. It was so neat and beautiful to watch him taking in this world he just became aware of. After a little while I put him on my shoulder (like I have done with all my babies, but this was the first time with him) and patted his back while he slowly fell asleep soundly on my shoulders. Before long it was feeding time again and he was wide awake! I sat him up again and he began to look everything over once again. Once he looked tired I put him on my shoulder until he fell fast asleep. I guess what made it so special is that for the first time it felt normal. I wasn't overly concerned with tubes, monitors and IV's I just held him like I would any of my other children. Does that make any sense? He wasn't uncomfortable, didn't have episodes and wasn't irritable. We were both relaxed, comfortable and enjoying the day. Yes, it was the simplest thing, but one of the sweetest!